FORECLOSURE

FEARS OF A COLLAPSE IN THE HOUSING MARKET HAS PROMPTED THE FEDS TO FIND A SOLUTION TO THE PROBLEM.

REALIZING THE SERIOUSNESS OF THE SITUATION, AN URGENT MEETING OF MAJOR BANKERS, MORTGAGE BROKERS AND OTHER THIEVES, WAS CALLED.

CREDIT CARD EXECUTIVES SHIED AWAY FROM THE POWWOW BECAUSE OF THE OVERWHELMING RECENT THREATS OF LYNCHING.

FOLLOWING INTENSE DISCUSSION ... 1 SOLUTION TO THE CRISIS:

A SELECT GROUP OF MORTGAGE HOLDERS FACING FORECLOSURE WILL HAVE THIER INTEREST RATE FROZEN ............. FOR A TEENY BIT ........ IF THEY QUALIFY.

IF YOU ARE A FOLLICLY CHALLENGED, INDONESIAN-AMERICAN TRANSEXUAL DWARF AMPUTEE, AND ARE A LEGAL IMMIGRANT ... WITH NO OUTSTANDING PARKING TICKETS .... YOU MAY BE ELIGIBLE ..... PROVIDED YOU ARE A REGISTERED LIBERTARIAN.