CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

NANCE & HARRY HAVE MANAGED TO PASS A HEALTHCARE BILL.

HERE'S THE GOOD NEWS:

1- THEY ACTUALLY WERE WORKING ON A "SATURDAY" OF ALL DAYS!!!

2- 220 CONGRESSMEN WILL BE REGISTERED AS PSYCHICS BECAUSE THEY NEVER READ THE

2000 PAGES.

3- 220 MILLIONAIRES WILL NOT BE AFFECTED BY THIS CATASTROPHE.

AND THE BESTEST NEWS FOR YOU GUYS:

THE H1N1 FLU SHOTS WILL BE AVAILABLE MID-2010 AS SOON AS THE CRISIS HAS PASSED.

WE WON ...... WE WON

YESSSSSSSSSSSS. YEP!!!!

THAT NANCE!!!!! SHE'SA PIP.

NICE GIRL. DOESN'T DRINK .....

BUT

ME THINKS SHE'S HITIN THAT MEDICINE CABINET A LITTLE TOO FREQUENTLY.

WILL SOMEBODY TELL HELEN HALLOWEEN'S OVER.

SHE KNOWS????

SO !!!

YA THINK ELECTING TWO REPUBLICAN GOVERNORS IS A BIG DEAL????

SEE!! THAT'S WHAT I MEAN.

YOU PEOPLE STILL DON'T GET IT.

THINK I'LL HAVE TO SPEND EVEN

MORE

TIME ON NATIONAL TV.

NOW, IF I COULD ONLY GET FOX OFF THE AIR WE'D HAVE A MORE LEVEL PLAYING FIELD.

AND

Y NOT NANCE ?????

UHHHH OOHHH

SLIP UP !!

SOMEBODY MADE A BOO BOO AND RELEASED A LIST OF LAWMAKERS UNDER INVESTIGATION BY THE

ETHICS

COMMITTEE.

THE ADMINISTRATION IS SO SHOCKED BY THIS NEWS THAT THEY ARE CONSIDERING THE REMOVAL OF THE WORD "ETHICS" FROM THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. MUCH LIKE THE "N" WORD. APPARENTLY, A GREAT MANY IVY LEAGUE INSTITUTIONS HAVE WHITED OUT THE WORD YEARS AGO. SO LET'S NOT MENTION THE "E" WORD FROM HERE ON IN.

PANDEMIC

H 1 N 1

OK ... OK ..... IT'S SERIOUS.

THIS ADMINISTRATION GRABBED THE BULL BY THE HORNS MONTHS & MONTHS AGO JUST IN CASE THIS DID BECOME A REAL THREAT ... SO DON'T WORRY.

SO WHO GETS THE SHOT FIRST?

CHILDREN? ........... NO

MOMS? ................... NO

GRANDMOM ................... NO

DAD ........................ NO

GRANDPOP ..................... NO

CARE GIVERS ........................ NO

OK ............ GIVE UP???

PRISONERS !!!!!

YA GOTTA HAVE HEALTHY MURDERERS. I MEAN ..... WHO ELSE COULD HANDLE THINGS IF THIS VIRUS GETS OUT OF CONTROL?

SO LET'S START INOCULATING!!!!! ......................... CAN'T !!!!

Y!!!????

WE DON'T GOTS ANY OF THIS STUFF ANYWAYS.

SEE HOW THINGS SEEM TO HAVE A WAY OF WORKING OUT!!????

RANGEL WANGEL

CHARLIE & TIMMY ARE BEST BUDS. AND WHY NOT? THEY HAVE LOTS OF COMMOM INTERESTS.

BOTH DETERMINE WHAT & HOW MUCH TAX YOU'LL PAY.

BOTH ARE TAX EVADERS.

BOTH WORK FOR BARRY.

NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT.

KINDA MAKES YA WANNA BE A PUBLIC SERVANT DON'T IT??

GOVERNMENT

HEALTH CARE PLAN

ICEMAN: HEY HARRY, ARE YOU TWO ALSO GONNA BE ON THIS PLAN??

HARR: OF COURSE !!! ........ WELL .... NOT HISACLY ..... BUT SIMILIAR.

ICEMAN: HOW SO HARR?

HARR: WELL .... FER ONE THING ... OURS IS CALLED A GOVT. PLAN.

ICEMAN: HOW BOUT YOU NANCE. WHATCHA THINK FER REAL?

NANCE: CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW. MY FACE FROZE AND MY PLANES WARMING UP.

ICEMAN: YA THINK I SHOULD GET ON THIS BASIC PLAN?

HARR: DEPENDS.

ICEMAN: ON WHAT?

HARR: MOSTLY IF YOU CAN SPEAK SPANISH OR FREQUENT EMERGENCY WARDS FOR GUNSHOT WOUNDS.

2012

MAYAN PROPHECY

END OF THE WORLD

DECEMBER 21, 2012

THE MAYANS WERE VERY INTELIGENT. THEY BASED THIS PROPHECY ON EITHER ONE OF TWO SCENARIOS.

1 - ALL THE STARS, PLANETS AND GALAXIES WILL LINE UP IN A PARTICULR WAY.

OR

2 - YOUR 401K WILL SUDDENLY BECOME WORTHLESS JUST BEFORE CHRISTMAS.

PERSONALLY, THE ICEMAN'S INTERPRETATION OF THE PROPHECY IS THAT A SIGNIFICANT NUMBER OF REPUBLICANS WILL VOTE DEMOCRAT.

THERE IS THE POSSIBILITY THAT THIS APOCOLIPTIC EVENT COULD BE AVOIDED IF SOME DEMOCRATS WAKE FROM THEIR COMA.