FIGHT GANG VIOLENCE

FINALLY ... THE CITIES HAVE FOUND THE SOLUTION TO STOP THE PROLIFERATION OF GANGS & GANG VIOLENCE ................

THEY'RE GOING TO SUE THEM !!!!

GANGSTAS (PHOTO) WERE LEFT IN SHOCK AND DISBELIEF.

NEW MEMBERS ARE NOW FACED WITH THAT AGE OLD QUESTION ...

" DO I INVEST IN MORE TATs OR DO I PURCHASE THAT SHINY NEW MAC IO."

PILL FOR DIABETICS

THE FDA ALMOST BANNED THIS DRUG AFTER TESTING REVEALED IT COULD INCREASE THE RISK OF HEART ATTACK.

FURTHER STUDY PROVED THAT A LARGER NUMBER OF INVESTORS WOULD SUFFER HEART FAILURE IF THE DRUG WAS REMOVED FROM DISTRIBUTION.

IT'S

" WATER " !!!

IDIOT

VICK

GOIN TO THE DOGS

CHEESE BOMB

-WARNING -

ALL AIRPLANE PASSENGERS WILL NOW BE SEARCHED, FELT UP AND PATTED DOWN FOR CHEESE WHEELS.

NEXT WEEK, HOMELAND SECURITY IS EXPECTED TO ISSUE ADDITIONAL ORDERS TO CHECK FOR BOMBS THAT MAY BE EMBEDDED IN SUPPOSITORIES.

PASSENGERS ARE REMINDED THAT SUPPOSITORIES TEND TO EXPLODE WHEN PASSING THROUGH METAL DETECTION MACHINES, LET ALONE, EXPLOSIVE DEVICES.

INSPECTORS WILL BE CHECKING FOR UNUSUAL TICKING OR OTHER SOUNDS.

A WORD TO THE WISE.

BIGGG BUTTSS

THE LATEST DISCOVERY

THE CAUSE OF OBESITY IISSS

FRIENDS

SOOOO!!!!

ALL I CAN SAY IS

I'M SORRY !!!!!

NOW STAY THE (BLEEP) AWAY FROM ME.

LIGHTER BAN

NOW YOU CAN TAKE YOUR LIGHTER ON THE PLANE ONCE AGAIN.

THREE REASONS:

1 - U CAN'T SMOKE NO PLACE NO MO.

2 - IF YA CRASH IN DA JUNGLE YA DON'T HAVTA KNOW HOW TA START A BONFIRE WITH STICKS.

3 - EJUMICATED TERRORISTS' DON'T CARRY FUSES NO MO.

A LARGE NUMBER OF AIRPORT EMPLOYEES ARE PROTESTING DA BAN CAUSE DEY BIN MAKIN A NICE BUCK ON ALL DA LIGHTERS DEY LIFTED FROM PASSENGERS.

" HARRY'S HERE "

12 MILLION COPIES HAVE BEEN PRINTED IN EXPECTATION OF SALES INCLUDING

1 COPY IN CAMDEN

2 COPIES TO BE SHARED BETWEEN NORTH & WEST PHILLY.

4 COPIES WILL BE TRANSLATED INTO SPANISH & SENT TO

EAST LA

I WEALLY WEALLY THORY & I PROMITH IT WON'T HAPPEN EVER EVER AGAIN ......

WELL ........

AT LEATHT TILL I CHANGE MY NUMBER.

2 BILLION BUCKS

JUST DON'T FORGET WE GOT 20 COMMANDMENTS NOW, WE KINDA SORTA CHANGED THE MASS AROUND AND NO BABY WILL GO TO HELL IF WE DON'T SPRITZ EM WITH ITALIAN WATER.

IN THE FUTURE, WE BEEN THINKING ABOUT USING IMPORTED BOTTLED WATER WITH A SPRAY TOP ..... LIKE WINDEX.

UGGHHH. OH! WE ALSO GONNA ADD LIKE A COUPLE A EXTRA COLLECTIONS DURIN THE NEW MASS AN DA ANNUAL BLOCK COLLECTION WILL NOW BE A MONTHLY COLLECTION.

WE WANNA OFFER ALL ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS A 30% DISCOUNT ON CONTRIBUTIONS BUT WILL STILL GUARANTEE SALVATION IF THEY KEEP THEIR MITS OFF DA POOR BOX AND CUT DA GRASS ONCE IN AWHILE. NO FOOD STAMPS OR PESOS WILL COUNT AS BUCKS EXCEPT ON CINCO DE MAYO.

CONFESSIONS WILL BE HEARD ONLY ON EVERY OTHER TUESDAY FROM 1PM TO 2 PM. THE REST OF THE TIME HAS BEEN BOOKED FOR DA NEXT 12 YEARS FOR OUR EMPLOYEE'S THAT HAVE NOT YET BEEN ACCUSED OF ANYTHING OR ARE FREE ON BAIL.

PS: ANYBODY WANNA BUY ONE OF OUR PLACES, OR MAYBE THINKIN FRANCHISE, LET ME KNOW. LONG TERM LEASES ARE AVAILABLE PROVIDING YOU DO NOT HAVE TO REGISTER AS A PREDATOR YET AND YOU CAN GET INSURANCE.

DO THE HUSTLE

DC MADAM

SERVICE IS OUR BUSINESS.

HOMELAND SECURITY

POPE

UFO

SIGHTING

YUP!!! I DID INDEED SPOT A UFO.

AS I RECALL, IT HAPPENED NOT LONG AFTER I WAS ATTACKED BY THAT RABBIT WHILE I WAS FISHING.

JIMMYS GOT ANOTHER HEADACHE.

ANYBODY GOT ANY EXTRA WEED FOR JIMMY??