" Cinco Causa "

(5 reasons)

Why hombres leave Mexico:

1 - No WALMART's here - no body shops for anything.
2 - No HOME DEPOT's - no body fixes anything.
3 - No SEVEN ELEVEN's - no body likes Slurpys.
4 - No rich American movie stars or politicians need a Nanny or Cook.- they just visit.
5 - No one cuts their grass.- no one actually owns a lawn mower.

" KER PLUNK " ????

" Pirates Attack U.S. Destroyers "

A fleet of one and a half Pirate vessels attacked two Navy Destroyers off the coast of Somalia yesterday. During the action, a conversation took place on board the Pirate ship.

MATE: Captain! Oh Captain!

CAPTAIN: ARRRRHH!.

MATE: What the (BLEEP) were you thinking?!!

CAPTAIN: ARRRRHH!!

MATE: Your (BLEEPING) shoulder parrot has more brains than you!

CAPTAIN: ARRRRHH!!! Me thinks Polly make a bo bo this time.

" GREEN POWER "

Immigration officers have vowed to deport all
illegal Irish immigrants although the repercussions
of this decision could be catastrophic.

Boston would become a ghost town.

No more St. Patty's Day Parade.

Notre Dame will be forced to close it's doors.

The Beer and Liquor industry could collapse.

Ted Kennedy might go on the wagon and
Conan O Brien threatened to dye his hair.

Last, but not least, Ireland has put the U.S. on notice that
they will recall most of their troops from Iraq.

Really, how can we possibly tolerate these people when all they do
is spend their time in the best universities and don't speak a word
of Spanish. How unAmerican! At least most other illegals are fluent in Spanish, cut your lawn for ya and, if need be, fill a few more slots at Walmart.

IRS " SURVEY "

" OSCAR & CHAD "

HEARTBROKEN OVER BROKEBACK

Chad: We were supposed to win weren't we?

Oscar: Leftcoasters musta changed their minds.

Chad: What are we gonna do with our special statues?

Oscar: Ship em to Frisco.

" GET REAL "

( ETHICS OVERSIGHT COMMITTE ?? )

LOGIC:

Some lawyers have no ethics.

Most Congressmen / Senators are lawyers.

THEREFORE:

Draw your own conclusion.