ONSTAR

IT NOW KNOWS:

WHERE YOUR GOING

WHERE YOU WENT

HOW FAR YOU DRIVE

YOUR DRIVING HABITS

IF YOU USED SEATBELTS

ALL KINDS OF STUFF

PHONE CALLS

PROBABLY KNOWS MORE ABOUT YOU THAN MOM DID

ISN'T THAT GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!

AND THEY SELL THAT INFO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TRUST ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT A SHAME.

THE ICEMAN IS GOING TO MISS:

WAITING IN LINE FOREVER

THE LONG FACES ON NASTY DRONES THAT GREET YOU

THOSE INTERESTING CONVERSATIONS WITH WORKERS THAT HAVE THE PERSONALITY OF A CINDERBLOCK

THE LATE MAIL

THE CRUNCHED MAIL

THE MISSING MAIL

THE LOST MAIL

THE MORE THAN REASONABLE COST OF MAILING A LETTER WHICH RISES YEARLY

AND OF COURSE, WE'LL ALL MISS CONTRIBUTING BILLIONS MORE EACH YEAR TO KEEP THE INCOMPETENT SYSTEM ALIVE

THANK GOODNESS WE STILL HAVE THE DMV

OK!!!!!

SO I PUT MY APPLICATION IN EARLY, JUST IN CASE THINGS DON'T WORK OUT.

TROUBLE IS, THEY DON'T THINK I HAVE ENOUGH EXPERIENCE FOR THIS JOB EITHER.

SPEECH

ARE YOU FORGETTING SOMETHING?????