TURBO TIMMY

PHILLY ... NOW KNOWN AS "THE CITY OF UTTERLY BROKE BROTHERS."

YUP ..... YUP ......

JUST LIKE THE THE STATE, ALL THE OTHER CITIES AND STATES ... PHILLY'S BROKE ....... BUT ..... MAYOR MIKES' GOT THE ANSWER.

ICEMAN: AND HOW'S THAT MIKEY?

MIKEY: WELL ... I'M GONNA DO JUST LIKE DC.

ICEMAN: OH OH .... DON'T TELL ME!!!

MIKEY: UHHUGH. IT'S EASY. WE'RE JUST GONNA RAISE THE PROPERTY TAXES ABOUT 35% AND RAISE TAXES ON ANYTHING THAT WE CAN THINK OF.

ICEMAN: HEY MIKEY ..... HOW COME YOUR ALL BROKE?

MIKEY: WELL IT AIN'T CHEAP KEEPING THIS MANY GOVERNMENT DRONES ON DA JOB WITH GUARRANTEED PENSIONS, HEALTH COVERAGE, CITY CARS AND TRUCKS AND STUFF. NOT COUNTING ALL THE HANDOUTS AND BUILT IN RAISES.

ICEMAN: BUT MIKEY, THE WORKER BEES ARE ALL BROKE. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BUCKS YOU COLLECTED FROM TOLLS AND THINGS THAT INCLUDED LABOR AND REPAIRS?

MIKEY: DIDN'T I TELL YOU ..... THERE GOIN UP TOO ...... IDIOT. NOW GET THE (BLEEP) OUTA MA FACE ....... AND DON'T FERGERT TA FEED YOUR PARKING METER.

ICEMAN: IS THE UNEMPLOYMENT OFFICE CLOSE BY?

DODD

AKA: THE DODO

SOOOOOOOO ......... IF YOUR

FLAT BROKE,

BUSTED,

OR

BANKRUPT !!!!!!!

WHAT DOO YOU DO ??..... WHAT DO YOU DO??!!!

WELL .......... YA RUN RIGHT OUT AND GET

$160,000,000,000.00 FROM DA FEDS.

DEN ...... YA HAND OUT, LEMME SEE ....., ROUND ABOUT

$50,000,000,000.00 TA FOREIGN COUNTRIES,

NEXT ..... YA THANK YOUR EXECS WITH A TINY $160,000,000.00 TIP FER BEIN DA BEST & BRIGHTEST IN DA BUSINESS.

COOL !!!!!

THE ONLY THING THAT CAN TOP THAT IS THE BEST & BRIGHTEST IN DC ..............

WHAT'S A MEASLY $160,000,000.00 WHEN YOU CAN'T ACCOUNT FOR $360,000,000,000.00 AND KINDA SORTA IGNORED $8,000,000,000.00 ON THE LAST GIVEAWAY?

THE ICEMAN IS NOW LOOKING FORWARD TO HIS $13.00 A WEEK CUT.

THE SPACE SHUTTLE

DISCOVERY

BEAUTIFUL!!

THE GOOD THING:

IT WAS VERY EXPENSIVE BUT IT WAS SUCCESSFUL.

THE OTHER THING:

THE LAUNCH WAS OBSERVED BY A LARGE GROUP OF SMOKERS WHICH OBVIOUSLY PRODUCED A HUGE CLOUD OF SECOND HAND SMOKE AS YOU CAN SEE. A REPRESENTATIVE OF THE GROUP CLAIMED THAT THE COST OF SMOKING THAT EVENING SURPASSED THE BILL FOR THE FLIGHT. SEVERAL SMOKERS LIT UP FROM THE EXHAUST AND RECEIVED 1ST DEGREE BURNS. THERE WERE NO WARNING SIGNS. THEY ARE CONTEMPLATING A CLASS ACTION SUIT.

THE EPA WAS CALLED OUT TO DETERMINE THE EFFECTS OF THIS CLOUD ON THE CITIZENS OF FLORIDA.

SPACE "JUNK"

REMOVAL PROPOSAL

SIDE EFFECT:

THE POSSIBILITY OF PELOSI & REID BRAIN CELL FUSION.

THAT IS BASED ON THE HYPOTHETICAL THEORY THAT THERE IS ACTUAL BRAIN ACTIVITY BETWEEN THE TWO.

HISTORICAL DATA DICTATES THIS ACTIVITY SEEMS REMOTE.

NAUGHTY NANCY

THE MILITARY IS UPSET BECAUSE OUR NANCE CONSTANTLY DEMANDS THE USE OF MILITARY AIRCRAFT.

SHE SIMPLY REFUSES TO USE HER PERSONAL BROOM ANYMORE.

NEWS HEADLINE

WE'RE BROKE

AT'S A SHAME. I'M SURE LOTS OF PEOPLE WILL MISS THEIR BIASED REPORTING AND ALL THAT BIRD CAGE LINING.

EVER BEEN THE SUBJECT OF A STORY? IF THE ANSWER IS "YES", MORE THAN LIKELY THE STORY WAS SO DISTORTED, YOU THOUGHT IT WAS SOMEBODY ELSE. IF IT WAS FRONT PAGE ...... AND WRONG ..... YOU COULD BANK ON A CORRECTION IN FINE PRINT, IN THE MIDDLE PAGE, ON THE BOTTOM OF SOME LATER ... MUCH MUCH LATER EDITION.

ONE GOOD THING THE ICEMAN HAS TO SAY ABOUT THE THREAT OF THESE BANKRUPTCIES.

PAYBACKS A BITCH. ( BLEEP) EM.

ON THE ROAD TO ...........

RECOVERY

YES, YES, THE ICEMAN HAD DOUBTS ABOUT STIMULI AND THE CARL SAGAN TYPE NUMBERS BANDIED ABOUT AS A SURE CURE FOR THE AMERICAN WORKER

BUT.............

IF YOU HAVEN'T YET BEGUN TO SEE THE WISDOM OF THIS INTELLECTUAL SOLUTION ...... YOU SOON WILL.

HUGE CONTRACTS TO MANUFACTURE OUR NEW ENERGY EQUIPMENT HAVE ALREADY BEEN DOLED OUT TO FOREIGN COUNTRIES AND HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF ILLEGAL ALIENS ARE LINED UP TO START WORK RIGHT HERE AT HOME.

YUP ........ NEVER DISMISS DA VALUE OF HI EGUMACATIOM. DEFINITELY........ DEFINITELY....... DEFINITELY.

OOOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HILLARY: SERGEY, I'LL BET YOU THOUGHT THIS WAS THE "STAPLES" "EASY" BUTTON. LOL

NOPE !!!!

YOU JUST ACTIVATED A WHOLE BUNCH OF I C B Ms. LOL

OK. OK. NOW GUESS WHERE THEIR GOIN.

..........................

NAAAA! THEIR REALLY HEADED TO PELOSI'S HOUSE.

" BIG AL "

NOW THAT MY CAREERS IN THE CRAPPER AND MY RADIO SHOW BANKRUPTED I FIGURED IT WAS ONLY LOGICAL TO MOVE ON TO A BIGGER AND BETTER GIG .......

SOOOOO! YOU CAN CALL ME SENATOR AL .................

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT!

WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT! WHAT!

GM DEALERSHIPS

EXPERIENCING A SLIGHT DOWNTURN IN SALES.

THEIR BANKING ON YOUR PROMISED 13 BUCKS A WEEK CUT OF THE STIMULUS TO REVIVE SALES.

UNFORTUNATELY, THE PROPOSED TAX INCREASES ON SODA, BOOZE, CHIPS, OREO'S, BURGERS, MOVIES, CABLE, PHONE, ELECTRIC, PROPERTY TAX, TOLLS, ETC.,ETC., MIGHT JUST CUT INTO THAT 13 BUCK WINDFALL ........ UNLESS OF COURSE .... YOU JUST LOST YOUR JOB, YOUR HOUSE, AND THE FAMILY TRUCKSTER WAS RECENTLY REPOSSESSED.

NOW THIS IS A CHANGE YOU CAN BELIEVE IN.