GIANT

SEA MONSTER

NORWEGIAN SCIENTISTS FOUND A 50 FT FOSSIL OF LIKE A MONOLITHIC FISH THINGY.

THEY FIGURE THE THING BECAME EXTINCT BECAUSE OF GLOBAL WARMING OR OVER FISHING.

A WORD TO THE WISE.

IT'S HERE !!!!!!

THE LONG AWAITED

DOOMSDAY

SEED BANK

JUST IN CASE WE BLOW THIS PLANET ALL TO HELL ------

REMEMBER ONE THING:

SOMEBODY TOOK THE TIME TO BURY A WHOLE BUNCH OF SEEDS AND BURIED THEM IN AN ARTIC MOUNTAIN IN REMOTE NORWAY. IT MAY BE A LITTLE TOUGH GETTING THERE, BUT ONCE YOU FIND IT, YOU COULD START FARMING ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.

I DO HOPE THEY SAVED SOME POPPY SEEDS.

COMING SOON !!!!!

NAFTA

SUPER HIGHWAY

4 FOOTBALL FIELDS WIDE

WOWWWWW!!!!!!!

ICEMAN: HOW LONG IS THIS BABY GONNA BE?

POLITICIAN: BOUT 4,000 MILE.

HOLY (BLEEP)!!! BOY!! THAT SHOULD SURE RELIEVE SOME OF THIS CONGESTION.

WELL. MAYBE.

WHATA YA MEAN ... MAYBE.

WELL ... DIS HERE IS A NEW SUPER HIGHWAY.

YA .... AND??

WELL .... SHE'S GONNA STRETCH FROM MEXICO TO CANADA. IT'S A NAFTA GIG.

NAFTA??!!! THAT DEALS KILLIN US. WHAT DA (BLEEP) DO WE NEED THIS FOR?

THE MEXICANS THINK IT'S A DAM GOOD IDEA.

OH ..... WHY DIDN'T YA SAY SO. THOSE ILLEGALS MUST BE GETTIN SICK AND TIRED WALKIN IN HERE MUCH LESS CLIMBIN FENCES & SWIMIN RIVERS.

WHO'S GONNA BUILD THIS THING ANYWAY? WE SURE NEED THE WORK.

BEST BID SO FAR IS A POCO COMPANY OUTA TIAJUANA.

(BLEEP)!!!!!!! R U GONNA HAVE A LOTTA NO STOPING SIGNS ON THIS THING .... LIKE EVERY COUPLA FEET? MAYBE WE CAN GIVE EM A STRAIGHT SHOT TO CANADA.

OLE MISS

TRIED TO INTRODUCE A LAW THIS WEEK TO

BAN FAT GUYS

FROM RESTAURANTS.

THIS CONFUSED THE ICEMAN.

DOES THIS MEAN HE HAS TO STAY OUTSIDE WITH THE SMOKERS BEFORE HE GOES INSIDE AND THEN COMES OUT TO SMOKE? DOES THE BAN EXTEND TO LUNCH WAGONS? MICKEY Ds DRIVE THRUs?

AH GUESS ONLY SKINNY FOLKS KIN EAT OUT NOW & THEN ....... TILL THEY FATTEN EM UP ... DEN YOUR (BLEEPED).

WHERE'S THE BEEF !!???

IT'S EITHER IN THE FRIG OR IN YOUR BELLY.

NOT TO WORRY.

THE BEEF THAT MAY BE CONTAMINATED WITH ECOLI OR MAD COW DISEASE IS ONLY IN ANYTHING PURCHASED SINCE FEB OF 2006.

SEE ... DONTCHA FEEL BETTER? I GUESS THE MILK WAS ok HUH.

BETTER RUN DOWN STAIRS AND CHECK THAT FREEZER. LOOK THROUGH ALL THAT STUFF YOU'VE BEEN SAVING FOR 2 (BLEEPING) YEARS.

REMEMBER .... DON'T SMOKE. IT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH.

" BAILOUT "

YUP .... YOU CAN ALWAYS BANK ON THE GOVT FER 2 THINGS .....

IT CREATES GIANT PROBLEMS ....

AN THEN ... IT DOES 1 HELLUVA JOB SOLVIN EM.

UNFORTUNATELY ... THAT SYSTEM USUALLY MAKES DA SITTIATION 10 X BIGGER.

DIS X ..... WE GETS TA SITIN AROUND SHOOTIN DA (BLEEP) ABOUT HOW AFTER WE SCREWED DA PUBLIC JUST A WEE BIT OVA DA TOP, TA DA POINT WE'RE JUS ABOUT BROKE ...... DEY FIGURED DA BEST WAY TA SOLVE DA PROBLEM AND KEEP THERE JOBS WAS WHAT ??

" BORROW 160 BILLION BUCKS FROM COMMUNIST CHINA !!!!! "

AND Y NOT !!?? MOST ANYTHING YA BUY COMES FROM THERE ANYWAY .... SO ......

WHAT THE (BLEEP) !!

THEY REALLY LOVE THIS GLOBAL TRADE (BLEEP) .

NOW WE CAN START PAYIN INTREST TO CHINA FOR THEIR LOAN, SEND A FEW BUCKS TO THE WORKER BEES, LET THEM RUN TA WALMART (A SUBSIDIARY OF RED CHINA) AND BUY MORE (MADE IN CHINA) (BLEEP) THEY DON'T NEED, AND SOMEHOW THAT'S GONNA SOLVE OUR PROBLEM. SUPER!

THOSE WHARTON SCHOOL BOYS SURE ARE A BLESSING.

BY THE BY, CHINA NEEDS THE DOUGH TOO WITH THER TREMENDOUS BUILDUP OF THEIR ARMY AND ALL. I GUESS THAT'S NOTHIN TA KEEP YA FROM SLEEPIN. LOL

PROBLEM !!!!!!!!

SOMEBODY CUT THE UNDERWATER DATA CABLE TA THESE GUYS AND THEY DON'T KNOW WHO.

MUSLIM EXTREMISTS ARE AT WITS END. NOT ONLY ARE THEY CUT OFF FROM PLAYING TEXAS HOLD EM ON AOL ...... BUT NOW THEY DON'T KNOW WHOSE HEAD TO CUT OFF NEXT.

THERE REALLY POd BECAUSE THEIR GETTIN BLAMED FOR THIS EVEN THOUGH IT'S COMMON KNOWLEDGE THEIR ALLERGIC TO WATER.

MISS NEVADA

SUPER DUPER

GURU GONE

HEALTH NEWS FLASH

OK. SO WE KNOW OUR WATER IS POISONED ALREADY .... & YOU SAY HOT TAP WATER IS WORSE?

LET ME MAKE A NOTE OF THAT.

SAY .... ISN'T EVERYBODYS ICEMAKER HOOKED UP TO HOT WATER? CAUSE HOT WATER FREEZES FASTER .... RIGHT?

YUP ...... SO ... WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?

NOTHIN .... JUST ASKIN.

AND YOUR SAYIN A JOINT IS LIKE 20 FAGS?

UH HUH

AND LIKE DIDN'T YOU LEFT-COASTERS JUST SHOWER CALIF. WITH GRASS VENDING MACHINES?

YEA ..... SO .... WHAT'S YOUR POINT?

WHY!!!!?????

ONE SUPER DUPER REASON A-HOLE .... CIGARETTES JUST AINT COOL NO MO.

SIDE EFFECTS?

WELLLLLL ?????? ...................